We spend so much time teaching our children that it’s okay to make mistakes, that learning is messy, that growth happens in the stumbles. But somewhere along the way to parenthood, we forgot to give ourselves that same grace.
Here’s what nobody tells you: there is no manual that perfectly fits your child. Because your child is unlike any child who has ever existed. They’re a universe of their own quirks, sensitivities, joys, and needs. And you? You’re discovering them day by day, just as they’re discovering themselves.
I used to think I needed to have all the answers before my daughter asked the questions. I’d lie awake at night, rehearsing responses to scenarios that never came, beating myself up over moments I wished I’d handled differently. Until one evening, after I’d completely misread her meltdown in the grocery store, she wrapped her small arms around my neck and whispered, “It’s okay, Mama. We can try again tomorrow.”
She gave me the permission I couldn’t give myself.
The truth is, our children don’t need perfect parents. They need present ones. They need parents who are brave enough to say “I don’t know, but let’s figure it out together.” They need to see us stumble and recover, to watch us apologize when we’re wrong, to witness us learning alongside them.
Every time you pause before reacting, you’re learning. Every time you choose connection over correction, you’re learning. Every time you admit you don’t have all the answers, you’re teaching them something profound: that it’s safe to be human here.
So today, I’m giving you permission to let go of the parent you thought you needed to be. The one who never loses their temper, who always says the right thing, who makes organic snacks from scratch while simultaneously teaching Mandarin and building self-esteem.
Instead, be the parent who shows up. Who listens. Who tries. Who apologizes. Who keeps choosing love, even when it’s messy.
Your child doesn’t need you to be perfect. They need you to be you, learning and growing right alongside them.
Reflection moment: What’s one area of parenting where you’ve been hard on yourself? What would it feel like to approach it with the same patience you offer your child?
LWW❤️
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